Saturday Snippets

Don’t you just love it when you wake up and your mind plays tricks on you first thing?

Last night I was up until about 4am, doing things around the house, preparing for the family to move down. This morning when I woke up, at about 10:30am, my mind decided to play it’s usual games with me.

At first I thought that I was late for something (you know how that goes…oh shit! I’m late!). But, of course, I couldn’t think about what I was late for. Then, before I could tell myself that I wasn’t late, my mind then proceeds to tell me that it is 10:30pm. So now I’m like, “great, an entire day gone!

Obviously I was able to correct my brain and tell it that it is still only Saturday morning. But, I do have to tell my brain one last thing: “F**k You, brain! Quit screwing with me every weekend, it is getting OLD!”

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In other news:

Only 6 more days until I am back with my family again! 😀 I cannot wait! It has been too damn long since I have been with them. Granted, they were down at the beginning of April, but visits are not enough! I have to remind myself to NEVERmove without them again! 9 months is too damn long to be without the ones I love. 😦

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Wanted to share with you all some more of my Wifey’s Textual Feelings (these ones are mainly all jokes she has texted me):

Summers Eve has a new douche, made of marijuana, deodorant & Kentucky fried chicken. It leaves women high, dry & finger licken good!! LOL

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Best engine ever made was the pussy. It takes any size piston, self lubricates, starts with one finger & does its own oil change once a month!!

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Vodka-19.99. Motel-54.99. Condoms-2.99.
Finding out she swallows & loves it in the ass!
Priceless!
Fuck Mastercard!
It Pays to DISCOVER!

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Teacher asked Timmy, why is ur cat in school 2day? Timmy says(crying)I heard daddy tell mommy I’m eating that pussy when the kids leave!!

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There is a report of a naked drunk wearing snow boots and riding a Big Wheel along the highway.  Where the fuck are you going?

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Only in Michigan would someone think to make a shirt like this:

MARVIN Shirt

That’s right, folks. It’s the OFFICIALM.A.R.V.I.N employees work-shirt. From what I hear, all employees are reqired to wear this shirt as part of their daily uniform (OK, OK, I made that up…but it sounds about right, doesn’t it?). For those of you that don’t know what MARVIN is, it is Michigan’s unemployment agency network. MARVIN stands for: Michigan’s Automated Response Voice Interactive Network.

Since the “Big 3” are struggling, and the UAW is losing members, I wonder if they might be interested in organizing a union for the fastest growing, and largest, pool of individuals throughout the nation? Just think about all the benefits that they could fight for? And, they wouldn’t even have to change their letters; it could still be the U.A.W – U Ain’t Working! I think their slogan could go a little something like this: “Uniting all the laid-off, unemployed workers of America, working to make America a better place.” No? Not a good Idea? Well, OK, I tried! 😉

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Oh, by the way, don’t forget that tomorrow is Father’s Day! Make sure to give your Dad a hug and tell him you love him. Or, if you are in the situation like me where you don’t live close enough to your Dad, make sure you give him a call!

I might, or might not, have a Special Sunday posting coming in celebration of Father’s Day (I know that it’s not noticeable yet, but Sunday’s is going to be my day off from postings, unless there is a special occasion :)).

Until next time, my friends,and have a great weekend…

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